One teachers approach to preventing gender bullying in a classroom
Alie arrived at our 1st-grade classroom wearing a sweatshirt with a hood. I asked her to take off her hood, and she refused. I thought she was just being difficult and ignored it. After breakfast we got in line for art, and I noticed that she still had not removed her hood. When we arrived at the art room, I said: “Allie, I’m not playing. It’s time for art. The rule is no hoods or hats in school.”
She looked up with tears in her eyes and I realized there was something wrong. Her classmates went into the art room and we moved to the art storage area so her classmates wouldn’t hear our conversation. I softened my tone and asked her if she’d like to tell me what was wrong.
“My ponytail,” she cried.
“Can I see?” I asked.
She nodded and pulled down her hood. Allie’s braids had come undone overnight and there hadn’t been time to redo them in the morning, so they had to be put back in a ponytail. It was high up on the back of her head like those of many girls in our class, but I could see that to Allie it just felt wrong. With Allie’s permission, I took the elastic out and re-braided her hair so it could hang down.
“How’s that?” I asked.
She smiled. “Good,” she said and skipped off to join her friends in art.
‘Why Do You Look Like a Boy?’
It’s amazing how much gender plays a role in our childhood. I was constantly bullied for “trying to be a boy” (as well as for being gay even though I didn’t know yet) due to my interests and choice of dress. I remember to this day how upset I was when my mother wouldn’t buy me boys jeans in 3rd grade. I was never comfortable in my body - I think it had more to do with the clothes than having a vagina and eventually breasts. I sometimes wonder if the only reason why I identify as female is because it has been ingrained in me - for me, having a vagina = being female. I know that in reality this is not the case, and I am very supportive of trans and other identities.
But for myself, it seems most convenient to be female, even if I often feel otherwise. The issue is I don’t feel male either. I feel nothing. The only thing feminine about me is my body - I have boobs, a vagina, curves, wider hips than a man, different fat displacement, thinner arms. My face is considered feminine too, I don’t know how to describe this. I guess it’s softer in shape with a less pronounced jaw? My face is changing though - it has become much thinner since losing weight, I think I am starting to look slightly androgynous - like I would be a pretty boy or something if I tried hard enough.
My taste in fashion is very androgynous - boys skate shoes almost always, skinny jeans (now considered ‘ok’ for boys to wear if they are hip enough), and unisex v necks most of the time. Sports bras, no makeup, occasionally a baseball cap, plain unisex sweatshirt. My interests are more masculine - they involve male dominated sports, male dominated hobbies, and male dominated professions.
I think I was born androgynous in gender. Unless I am playing dress up for fun you will never see me in a dress or anything feminine - I feel like a cross dressing dude when I dress female.
It’s funny - I once mentioned to a friend/crush of mine that I never felt female - and she responded back that I sure as hell act like a girl (after having my feelings hurt by her). I was so surprised and offended by it - of all people she would be the last person I would imagine to use gender as an insult. it took me a while to get over it, not because of the initial offense but more so the resounding questioning going on inside myself - was I a girl? was I a boy? was I neither? was I trying too hard to not be a girl?
It eventually resolved itself - I just don’t care enough to label myself one thing or another. I suppose I am technically androgynous and agender, but I am fine with being considered female by society just because it is convenient and I don’t care enough.
Strong (by RPerry2012)
please flag this as hate speech, because it is. please repost this as well on your own facebook, reblog it on your tumblr, retweet it on your twitter - to spread the word - we have a man running for president who not only hates gays but clearly disrespects non-christians as well. perhaps he doesnt understand the concepts of the inalienable right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness; as well freedom of and from religion, and the separation of church and state. you don’t have to be a liberal to be against hate of all kinds.
Also…
Sorry to frighten the fuck out of my new followers.
THIS^ is love. I was dying, due to pcp pneumonia and acute respiratory failure/distress. I lost over 150lbs, one of my lungs collapsed and will never re inflate, I had chest tubes, multiple IV’s, I was on a ventilator, had a tracheostomy, had to re-learn how to walk, talk, eat and breathe on my own, all over again. My husband, was there for me EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. The amazing doctors and nurses at KU Medical Center ALL commented on how amazingly dedicated my husband was. How few husbands show such tenderness and love. I would have died, had he not been there to keep me going.
I have a man who wiped my ass for me because I messed myself in my hospital bed.
Now, tell me that we are going to ruin the sanctity of marriage and I will bust your fucking teeth out.
![queersecrets:
[image: a rainbow flag with the bisexual moon symbol in the upper left corner and the pan flag in the lower right corner. text: “The Good News: I found a label for myself that is more accurate than bisexual. The Bad News: If I identify myself by this more proper label, I will have to spend the rest of my life explaining what panromantic homo-demihetero-sexual means. Why can’t I just be a lesbian?”]
Reason number 157 why I hate labels. They are fucking stupid. Isn’t “queer” at the end of the LGBTQ supposed to be a catch all for the rest of the gays (my catch all phrase for non-heteros, not necessarly cis-men who like other cis-men) who dont fit into the LGBT spectrum but arent hetero? Why can’t my fellow gays of many stripes learn to just be? If you know what you like, then you are set. No need in coming up with a fancy label to identify yourself to others.](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lv70hekJ5V1qcpj7wo1_1280.png)
[image: a rainbow flag with the bisexual moon symbol in the upper left corner and the pan flag in the lower right corner. text: “The Good News: I found a label for myself that is more accurate than bisexual. The Bad News: If I identify myself by this more proper label, I will have to spend the rest of my life explaining what panromantic homo-demihetero-sexual means. Why can’t I just be a lesbian?”]
Reason number 157 why I hate labels. They are fucking stupid. Isn’t “queer” at the end of the LGBTQ supposed to be a catch all for the rest of the gays (my catch all phrase for non-heteros, not necessarly cis-men who like other cis-men) who dont fit into the LGBT spectrum but arent hetero? Why can’t my fellow gays of many stripes learn to just be? If you know what you like, then you are set. No need in coming up with a fancy label to identify yourself to others.
November 7th
9:53 PM
9:53 PM
The Queer San Francisco Woman Having Group Sex in New York -- Daily Intel
this is quite excellent, and the comments are also excellent.
This is a Short Film called “Hetero”. What if the roles were reversed? What if being homosexual was normal and being heterosexual was not?
this is amazing
I just got teary eyed. And the part in the bar… the britney and ke$ha playing… the bathroom stall… yeah, my life.
Let’s see, my mother failed points 1, 2, 3, and 5.
My GENDERS class in a nutshell.
+++ props for getting the definition for bisexual right!
im a shitty gay (well, technically a lesbian. i dont like the way the word sounds, so i call myself gay even though im female and i like other females). i didnt know half of the queer or trans identities. oops. perhaps its because im not a fan of labels… theres no need to put people in a box, unless they really wanna be in that box.
i suppose the moral of my story here is just accept people for who they are. i believe that gender and sexuality are fluid, and to label oneself as anything somewhat negates the fluidity. maybe thats just me. i know some lesbians who would never think of wanting a penis in them, and i know some lesbians who occasionally enjoy the penis. hell, i was with a penis for three and a half years - yet all three examples here refer to ourselves as lesbians. is the gold star more lesbian than those who arent? ps - im referring to the men as penises to distinguish them from ftm - i know some lesbians who are down with ftm and thats cool too… but where does that fit on this spectrum? pansexual? and yet pansexuals get much criticism because its like “in” or whatever to be pan, but its just putting a label to the idea of loving a person regardless of what is in their pants or what gender they identify as.
i really hate labels. perhaps its personal, because ill never feel like im “lesbian” enough for other lesbians since i was in a hetero relationship for so long. i cant stand the discrimination and bias inside the gay community - sometimes i think its just as bad as the rest of the hetero world. look at bisexuals for example - they get hated on from both the heteros and the non heteros because they are seen as being too fluid, too slutty (ugh), too greedy… ect. its such bullshit. i had to go through a fuckload of nonsense when i was discovering my sexuality - i first identified as bi (i was with the ex at the time) before coming to terms with the fact that i was far more into women than men - therefore, lesbian, in my opinion. so much stress, and all over a stupid fucking label and the assumptions that come with it.
fuck labels. love people for who they are.
24 years old & Transgender.
The laws you have don’t protect me from discrimination or violence in 37 states. Beat me up, fire me, throw me out of my home, no one will care. We aren’t different from you… we are all the 99% - Occupywallst.org
Inexcusable.
Pre-T vs 13.5 months body changes, also 11 weeks post op with Dr Gary Alter
Kind of crappy lighting in the pre-T photo but it’s the only one I have like that. I was always very self conscious of my hips, I started noticing differences around 7 months but now is really when I’m seeing major changes alongside with working out. Every month it gets better.
kidnappedelf.tumblr.com surgery questions etc, don’t judge me on the tanlines
wow, the change in the body fat distribution is crazy… i can’t believe being on T for a little over a year can do that! he looks great - i would of had no idea that the photo on the left was the same person as the photo on the right.
Thirteen years ago tonight, on October 6, 1998, Matthew Shepard was brutally attacked and left to die, simply because he was gay. He was found almost a full day later tied to a fence, and died in the hospital on October 12. When he was found, the only parts of his face that were not covered in blood were the small streaks where his tears had fallen. Since that day, Matthew has become a symbol for the hate and discrimination against the LGBTQ community. We have come so far in those thirteen years, but we still have a long way to go.
R E B L O G.
anyone connected to the ACLU ????
——————————————————
19 year old transman violently attacked for being trans
19-year-old transman, James Alexander, was violently attacked for being trans yesterday morning while going for a walk in his neighborhood. To get to his destination, he had to walk past the house of a girl he was once interested in who had turned him down in the past (saying that “she can’t be with him because he’s not a real man” and that “she’d consider him IF he had a penis.”, and also calling him a “faggot”.), but he didn’t think anything of it, as he’s lived in the area for three years. He certainly wasn’t expecting what was to come.
As he walked past the house of the girl, she came out, and told him she wanted to talk to him. James stopped, to be polite, and because he figured he’d let her say what she needed to say. She asked him if he is a man, to which he said “Yes.”. She then told him to prove he’s a man. He told her off, and began to walk away. As he was walking away, he felt someone grab the back of his shirt. The person spun him around to face them, and he discovered that it was the girls six-foot-five, 25-year-old boyfriend, Mark. Mark yelled in his face and also told him to prove he was a guy. James told him to back off, and shoved him away. Both the girl and Mark called James a “faggot”, and he began to cry. The two of them then proceeded to make fun of James for crying, saying “Oh look, the little girl is crying”. James started to walk away again, as Mark approached him and punched him in the face, right in the eye.. and continued hitting him repeatedly, while laughing, because James was crying.
James, who is significantly smaller than Mark, at five-foot-eight, and is not a violent person at all, defended himself as best he could, and got away.. but not before he sustained injuries to his face and hand, as well as psychological trauma.
James’ mother called the police, and also had him take photos of his injuries.. but it would seem that Mark is not going to be charged, after all. James explains, “It’s his word against mine. He has his mom, his girl, and three other people saying he didn’t do anything.. so even though I have a broken face and can’t physically stop crying or shaking, he is just getting a warning. I’m pressing charges, but he won’t be arrested. Just told to go to court on a certain day I guess.”
The bottom line is that he was attacked for a specific reason; for being trans. That qualifies what happened to him as a hate crime. This was a violent transphobic attack, and the guy who did this to this 19 year old transman, needs to be charged and convicted accordingly. It’s unfortunate that they won’t arrest Mark.. but I do hope that once this goes to court, he’s punished. He shouldn’t be able to just get away with this. Too many times has an incident like this happened, and the attacker gone free. It’s time we (transgender individuals) started being taken seriously when things like this happen to us.
If anyone who is reading this knows of any resources that could help James to ensure his attacker is convicted (legal counsel for trans people, etc), he can be contacted at ericjames1302@yahoo.com.
Also, if you’re a journalist who would like to write about this, I encourage you to do so, as increasing awareness about this incident is very important. There needs to be a huge public outcry about this. This boy needs all the support he can get. Then, maybe something will be done.
Once again, James can be contacted at ericjames1302@yahoo.com.Please reblog. Infinitely. The world must hear about this.
No one should have to go through anything like this. Everyone has the right to be who they are, and accepted. I hope beyond hope that Mark is arrested for doing this.
On top of all that, Mark is pressing charges against James. Because he hit back. Once. In self-defense. And Mark doesn’t have a scratch on him. But the police still showed up at James’ door. He doesn’t deserve something this horrible, nobody does.
R E B L O G !!!
awful.
